The First Time Mum – For Mums and Mums to be

Peggy’s first trip across the pond

06/11/2025

Another month has flown by. I did intend on writing these more often but the days just seem to disappear. We have certainly crammed a lot in to the last month.

We started off October with our first swimming lesson. I think she was a bit overwhelmed in our first lesson and was very quiet, but now she is splashing about as soon as we get in. It is so much fun! I was quite apprehensive about our first visit, for starters I haven’t worn a swimming costume in months, but I decided I wouldn’t be the only one so surely it would be fine. And then the question of… where do I change her, what does she wear, what do I need, should I shower her, how do I change and change her at the same time… the list of questions was endless.

So my advice to anyone taking their baby swimming for the first time would be to take the pram. I actually don’t know what I would have done without it and now we have the routine down pat. I usually have us both in our togs beforehand to save at least a little bit of faff. You can buy reusable swimming nappies but I bought disposable ones. Fun fact – as long as there is no number 2’s in them, these can also be washed and reused! How good.

Once the lesson is over the best bet is to hunt down a family changing room. I shower and change Peggy, plonk her in the pram and give her a bottle whilst I wash and change myself. We also treat ourselves to a dip in the warm spa pool before we get out. That is a treat! Peggy usually also treats me to some lunch after swimming, after all it is thirsty work! But now my maternity pay has stopped I think we might have to relinquish that activity.

The next big milestone this month was a fishing trip. Hayden bought Peggy a life jacket and her first rod (which of course was also usable by adults!). We went 15kms off shore and she slept the whole way out and back. Just like a little starfish! I didn’t feel quite 100% so sadly I couldn’t even get a rod in the water but Peggy enjoyed sitting on my lap watching everyone bring all the fish in. Fresh blue cod for dinner it was. Delicious.

We had our first horse show of the season and it turned out to be a great success. I’m not sure Hayden will be very keen to come to anymore, but at least I did win a few red ribbons. Larry was so good and it has set us up nicely for the rest of the show season. We then had another horsey trip up to Christchurch. I took Larry to Leeston show which didn’t go quite as well as the previous week but it was a great show with heaps of entries. Peggy had her first proper ride on her future pony, Cutie. Thanks Ninny (Alison!).

On Thursdays we now go to a class called TumbleBubs. This is a lot of fun. We usually start off with a group activity and then we can take our children to different stations in the room and spend the next half an hour doing what we wish (within reason. Unfortunately there is no wine available!). Peggy loves it and I enjoy it a lot too as it is a great opportunity to meet other mums and actually have time to chat.

Nearing to the end of October we spent the long weekend in Bannockburn with our good friends Charlie and funcle Bailey. A lot of wine was drunk, cocktails made, food eaten, a puzzle completed and generally good fun. It was a lovely sunny weekend but it decided to snow on our journey home and I’d say we were lucky to leave when we did.

Hayden and I also went to see Bill Bailey last weekend. This was our first night with both of us away from Peggy. Thank you to Nanny and Grandad Reggie for babysitting. I have to say I was a lot more relaxed than I thought I was going to be! So thanks again – you’re both hired.

I continue to try Peggy with different foods. Mainly at lunchtime, although I have now started giving her some dinner. She fits in the high chair that clips onto the table quite well now, so it is nice for all three of us to sit around the dinner table. At my Plunket appointment this week I asked about other options of feeding her. She does enjoy it, but gets bored very quickly; a few licks and spits and that’s it. So the Plunket nurse suggested I try some finger foods instead of purées. Since then she has tried whole cooked broccoli, hard boiled eggs, sliced tinned peaches and peeled cucumber. She seems to love it and keeps her entertained for a lot longer. I’d say the cucumber is the favourite at the moment.

Oh but how could I forget the steak. Sorry, I take the cucumber back, steak is by far her favourite food. She will suck on a slice for hours. Until she’s sucked it dry!

And so this week we had swimming on Monday morning, job interview Monday afternoon, Plunket Tuesday, Wriggle and Rhyme Wednesday and TumbleBubs today (Thursday). Tomorrow we are off to Dunedin and I’m using a voucher I very kindly got for my birthday at a spa. That will set me up nicely for a good friends hen do this weekend too!

And just if things weren’t busy enough, next Monday we have swimming and the farrier and Peggy, Larry and I, along with the three dogs, will make our way up to Christchurch, ready for the show at the end of the week. It’s all a bit crazy to be honest!

But the icing on the cake… only three weeks until we’re jetting off to the UK. I absolutely cannot wait to see all my family and friends. It is going to be a very special Christmas indeed.
The Jersey cow

05/10/2025

Where has the last month gone. The time sure seems to disappear so quickly. A lot has happened in the last four weeks. Peggy is six months in a few days which is crazy!

She is now rolling over both ways with ease. I know she’d really like to crawl but we’re just working that one out. The knees have come up under the belly a few times, so I don’t think it will be far away. We’ve also had another Plunket check up this month. Hayden and I took Peggy to her five month check up in Palmerston a couple of weeks ago. She weighed 7.12kg and 64cm long. So everything is all tracking well. We have the next appointment in a month’s time and continue to have these check ups until she goes to school at the age of four. Obviously we’re still trying some solids too and whilst she isn’t really eating, I think she is enjoying all the different textures and flavours.

We’ve been to a few more music classes in Oamaru and always enjoy a trip to the op shops after. Peggy will treat me to a coffee and cake too, how good. An old lady was chatting to us in the cafe the other day and said to Peggy how lucky she was to have such a good mum. How lovely, there really are some great humans out there! I also bought heaps of clothes for a good friends’ baby, great excuse for a shop. We caught up with her and her baby too, which was just the best.

Hayden treated us to a night in Danseys Pass last weekend. We visited the same AirBnB last Christmas and loved it so much. I highly recommend – https://www.instagram.com/danseyspasslavenderfarm?igsh=dGxjeW9rYnk0eDly

Another big milestone was my permanent residency coming through. I have been a NZ resident for two years now, so it was time to apply for permanent residency so that I can continue to come in and out of the country easily. That got approved, so now you Kiwi’s are stuck with me!

Next on the big milestone list was being made redundant. It is extremely sad for sure, but I’m also looking forward to some new opportunities and spending quality time with Peggy. I’ve been so independent my whole life, so it certainly seems odd not having a job and relying on Hayden’s income, but we are very lucky with what we have here.

I am continuing to pump and that still goes well. I feel so lucky to be able to produce so much milk. I know that not all mums can keep up with their babies demand and this must be so hard. I didn’t have an easy run at the start with Peggy not latching but I am so lucky to be such a good producer… the Jersey cow!

We have our first swimming lesson tomorrow morning. I haven’t been in togs for a long time, so it could be a scary sight! Peggy loves a bath and a shower so I’m hoping she will love swimming too. It was definitely one of my favourite things as a child.

It isn’t long until our trip back to the UK, just over seven weeks. The diary for our time there is filling up fast. We can’t wait to see you all. I hope you’re ready for the chaos!
Peggy and the Pumpkin

09/09/2025

Peggy has started to really change in the last week or so. She is in the phase of being distracted by anything and everything, which can make feeding her pretty entertaining and much longer than it needs to be! Crying because she’s hungry for the bottle but, oh wait, what’s that, a lampshade!

We’ve been extremely lucky with her sleeping habits but recently she has become a little more unsettled. Hayden has been wanting us to start solids with her for ages and I’ve been putting it off. Mainly because milk is so easy, and free! I really did not know where to start. But yesterday was the day. I gave in to those big blue eyes. I had already roasted a pumpkin for our dinner so I mashed some up along with a bit of my milk.

A friend had mentioned about a silicone feeder of which I actually had sitting in the cupboard. So I filled one of those up and let the chaos commence. She seemed to love it! I also gave her a spoon of pumpkin, which again created more mess, but gosh it was entertaining to watch. And kept her extremely occupied for quite some time.

Today was another big day of jabs. Three this time. She screamed like I’ve never heard her scream which was pretty hard to watch so I’m glad that’s it for a while, until she’s one. We popped into a friend’s on the way home to pick up some cream for her chin. Thanks Karly! She has been getting quite sore under her chin and around her neck from all the spews and dribbles, so fingers crossed this does the trick. Hayden had lamb shanks roasting in the oven (thanks Pip) so we had an early dinner with Peggy watching on. She was treated to a pumpkin starter and a lamb shank for main. Yum yum.

It was great to get over to see some friends, Matt and Jayne, on the weekend and catch up with a good group over dinner. What a treat to have such a good bunch of friends. Hayden and Matt tried to find some deer to shoot but sadly it was so windy they were all tucked away. Although I did hear there was an attempt on a pig, we wont mention who missed….

This weekend I hope to get out on Larry for some showjumping and maybe try out the local pub in Maheno that has reopened.

Spring is starting to arrive and the daffodils are popping up all around the garden. It is looking lovely! The living room is full of seedlings still. I am amazed I’ve managed to keep them alive for so long. So far we have…. Pumpkins, tomatoes, chillies, peppers and basil in the house and lettuce, spring onion, beetroot, broccoli, radishes and coriander in the greenhouse. Oh and the raspberry canes are starting to shoot leaves and the horseradish is starting to pop out of the raised beds. It’s all quite exciting. How life has changed!
On the move

28/08/2025

I have a car! Wahoo! Having my own transport again is an absolute game changer and means I can come and go as I please with Peggy. Now there will be no stopping us, so I’m looking forward to some baby classes and getting Peggy swimming. Thank you so much to Hayden’s family for finding me the UFO (as we call it).

The weather has been so lovely recently. Spring is definitely on the way. Hayden’s parents and younger brother stayed with us last weekend. As always this was a great time, filled with lots of food and drink! Larry also had an outing to the beach, and it was just the best day. Sun shining, Larry and all the other animals and Peggy enjoying life. I feel so lucky to have the beach on our doorstep. If this was in the UK and it was a nice day, I probably wouldn’t be able to move for people on the beach, but here… not a sole to be seen. Just bloody lovely.

So, life is incredibly sociable at the moment which is great. Yesterday, Peggy and I had a girl’s trip to Oamaru. I had great intentions of getting to the baby music class Wriggle and Rhyme but sadly it wasn’t to be. It took me an hour longer to get out the house than planned, so although things weren’t going to plan, I ventured out anyway. Peggy decided against her morning nap, so she was very noisy, her car seat had moved, and I couldn’t work out how to recline it further, I couldn’t get the pram in the back of the ute because it was soaking wet, then I struggled to fit it on the back seat. By which point Hayden turned up and I was close to exploding. Luckily the calming influence helped.

Coffee was first on the list. Peggy was now in her new car seat, which she loves! Quite happily sat in the back blowing bubbles.

We made it to Oamaru in one piece, got the pram out and proceeded to shut my thumb in the car door. Lots of swearing could probably be heard from a few miles away.

Anyway, it was a lovely sunny day, so we had a nice wander around town and lunch in Badger and Mackerel cafe. Peggy was in her pram, so I certainly appreciated the shops with open or automatic doors and no steps! The things you notice since having a baby….

We finished our trip by christening the new ute with a nappy change on the front seat.

Last night we also ventured over to Middlemarch to have dinner with Dad number two, Lindsay. He is off to the UK this weekend and hopefully will catch up with my parents. I hope he has an amazing time and thank you for being the best second Dad I could wish for!
Now we’re farming

15/08/2025

It has taken me nearly all week, to write this. Actually, it has taken me all week. Everything takes triple the time it used to these day! But anyway, exciting news…

We have chickens back!

The farm has been a bit like a ghost town the last few months, which has been very odd but also nice to have Hayden about, popping in and out of the house. It’s been very satisfying getting all the jobs done around the house that have been on the list for a while. Although, I hate to tell Hayden, but there are still a few more to do!

I wasn’t as involved in the Bird Flu outbreak as Hayden was, but gosh, what a time it was. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone; to have to go through that process. Unfortunately though, it was just really bad luck, nothing we could have done to stop it. The farm is very close to the coast and so that sadly doesn’t fall in our favor either. Hayden has been putting together new biosecurity plans for the farm, so I really hope that keeps things at bay.

But anyway, on to the positives. How good to have the farm starting again! The first flock of 20,000 brown shavers arrived on Monday. We swapped parental duties for an hour or so on Wednesday and I went and weighed the chickens whilst Hayden drove Peggy around the farm. She slept the whole time of course! It was great to be back and something that I used to find quite mundane, was suddenly quite exciting. They’ve come to us from the rearing farm across the road at 15 weeks, so hopefully we will have eggs again in another month. Wahoo!

Another very exciting thing is happening today too… Larry is back! I cannot wait to hop on him and have a wander around the farm and down the beach with him. I am so lucky to have him, I really could not wish for a better horse. I also cannot wait for the day Peggy has her own pony and we can go riding together. Hayden… not so much. He is excited for the day Peggy goes fishing and gets her first motorbike.

In other news, Peggy is doing great. She has huge fat rolls on her legs and big chubby cheeks. She’s certainly got the ginger fire in her belly, so I am bracing myself for the teenage years. She is however, an extremely good sleeper and we’ve had a couple of records the last few nights. I am still getting up to pump in the night though, only once now rather than twice. It just helps keep up with her drinking as she always has a hungry spurt in the afternoon.

We go through about 5 bibs a day now. She has become very dribbly and spewy! Although she doesn’t seem bothered by it, the washing machine is in full use!

The sun is shining today and I cannot wait to see Larry later. I hope everyone back in the UK is coping with the warm weather and please send it our way.
Getting ready for Kindy

04/08/2025

Time is flying by, and Peggy is now four months old. Crazy!

I had booked a year off work for maternity leave but have now arranged to go back when she is six months, in October. I love her to bits, but my brain needs something else to do. To keep me sane! Although I wasn’t particularly happy about my job changing to part time, now I have Peggy I think I’m quite lucky. God knows what I will be doing when I go back to work, but I will be working two full days and some extra hours to make up my 20 hours a week. This will just be perfect!

Two and a bit days of work each week, will actually be so good for my sanity. I never thought I would be excited about work, but I’m looking forward to having a goal and something to focus on. The rest of the week will obviously be spent with Peggy, watching her very rapidly grow and change.

Hayden and I took Peggy to Kindy last week to meet the people there and have a look around. Everyone was so lovely and there was a nice atmosphere. There is even a teacher there called Peggy! Hopefully Peggy will look forward to her days here and making new friends.

Peggy is still loving to blow raspberries! I think she must have a competition with herself to see how many bibs she can go through in a day. The washing machine continues to be constantly on the go and there is always washing hanging out to dry. Who would have thought such a small person can create such a mess. And I’m sure it will only get worse!

Hayden receives his first flock of chickens since the bird flu outbreak next week. Very exciting! This is the first of eight flocks to come back in, but it’s exciting to slowly get back to some normality on the farm. Larry also arrives back in a couple of weeks, so I am very excited to get back riding him!
The postpartum surprises

27/07/2025

There are a few strange things that happen to you whilst you’re pregnant and some random things certainly pop out of the woodwork once you’ve given birth too.

I didn’t have many cravings whilst I was pregnant, but I did suddenly go off coffee, which was a bit sad! I reverted to a good old builder’s tea in the morning to satisfy the caffeine fix. I would get full so quickly and need a wee every five minutes, which probably won’t come as a surprise to most people. I also had the worst heartburn. But considering I was growing a human, I think I got off pretty lightly with only this and no nausea or sickness. Now she is out in the fresh air and not squashing my organs, the heartburn, full bladder and stomach have disappeared.

There have been a few other changes to my skin and hair too. Whilst I was pregnant with Peggy my hair got a bit thicker, which seems to be quite common. But my skin was also so nice! I don’t wish to go back to the feeling of constantly feeling full and bloated but I would like to go back to those days of nice smooth skin. When Peggy was a few weeks old the skin on my face started to get really dry, spots started to appear, and my lips were as dry as the Sahara Desert. I hadn’t changed anything, I was moisturising every morning and night but suddenly, bam, I felt like a teenager again.

I went into our local pharmacy and they gave me some samples of moisturiser and other cream to try for my cracked lips and dry skin. Luckily it worked an absolute treat, and I would definitely recommend! The cream is called XeraCalm by Avene. I have quite sensitive skin, but I have had no problems with this, it’s just been great. They also gave me Crystaderm for my cracked lips and that cleared them up within a day.

Buy Avene XeraCalm A.D Lipid-Replenishing Cream 400ml Online at Chemist Warehouse®

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I would also love to lose some weight and if only this was as easy as fixing some dry skin! I put on around 12kg whilst I was pregnant and now four months after giving birth, I am just a few kilo’s off my previous weight. I am pretty proud of this, but God, what a slog it is! Hayden is such an amazing cook and we both love food, which makes it hard, but we try to eat as healthy as we can and it still seems to be the hardest thing. All our meat is home-kill, and I’d like to say we grow our own veggies, but unfortunately, we don’t seem to have a green finger between us. But we’re working on it!

So, mums, I just want to reassure you that all those funny things you are feeling is normal. All that extra fat that has appeared, it’s normal. Those stretch marks, they’re normal. That baby brain, it’s normal! Don’t beat yourself up, we are all in the same boat.
Every day is a school day

17/07/2025

Sorry folks but I’m going back to the feeding topic… this really is such a big part of having a baby and seems never ending. And the things you continue to learn about yourself, and your baby is also never ending.

We are very fortunate to have a good sleeping and content baby. No idea how it happened, but it has. The main thing that hasn’t gone quite to plan, however, is the breastfeeding. But it turns out, that is also normal. The pumping has worked so well for me and I’m pretty proud of myself to be still pumping for over three months. Although pumping obviously still comes with its challenges.

I have a cupboard full of bottles, teats, storage containers, sanitising gear; you name it, this cupboard would probably take you to Narnia if you tried hard enough. Although I probably should mention that the cupboard is for everything drink related, for Peggy and the adults. So, the whole bottom half is full of alcohol… you never know when you might need it!

This past week Peggy has been unusually grizzly. Initially we put it down to her not feeling too great after her jabs. But then last night we started asking ourselves, what has changed in the last week to 10 days? Why do I have so much spare milk in the fridge? Why is she pooing less? Why is she suddenly screaming the house down when we put her to bed? Turns out, there was a very simple answer to this.

When we left the Oamaru maternity ward, we took home a heap of spare bottles and teats. These teats are supposedly single use. But at the time we had nothing else, and she drank fine from them, so we continued to use them. At around 6 weeks old we tried to transition her on to new bottles and teats. These were Philip Advent. We tried slow and medium flow, but both failed. Even with the pace feeding she would be so sick from the medium flow and with the slow flow she would just stop sucking and then scream if you took the bottle away. This is exactly what she did on the boob. So, we reverted back to the original teats.

A few weeks later we tried some slow and medium flow Medela teats. Exactly the same issue. Again, we reverted back to the originals. I managed to get some more of these from the maternity ward, but I was told these were really only for newborns. Again, who knew? Who knew that there are all these different flow rates? Who knew that there are all these different shapes and sizes? Who knew that the teats are meant to change as your baby gets older? I certainly didn’t!

A midwife suggested I try Dr Brown’s bottles. I bought one to try last week and it seemed to go well. So, we bought a few more and here we are over a week down the line with these.

But last night we had an epiphany. All these changes in her behaviour coincided with the change to new bottles. The reason for all the spare milk, all the tantrums – she was hungry. We switched from the Dr Brown bottle back to the original hospital teats mid feed last night and it was like I had starved her. She drank the whole bottle within minutes. She then proceeded to sleep right through the night again.

Today I am again feeding her through these original teats, and I am so happy to have my normal happy Peggy back. Why had I not noticed this sooner? We still probably need to find a solution for a long-term teat, but for now I am just happy to have my smiley, bubbly baby back.

So, every day is a school day. No one told me any of this. I had to learn it for myself. And it turns out this is quite a common theme with babies. You don’t know what you don’t know, and everyone is so different.

Also, a big shout out to The Milk Room in Oamaru. This is a free service available to mums to help with anything feeding related. A quick message to them on Facebook and they’ve helped me so much with advice for sore boobs and now with bottles. They are available to see in person in the Plunket rooms in Oamaru every second Tuesday. www.facebook.com/themilkroomnorthotago
Three months in

10/07/2025

Where has the time gone?! Days turn into weeks which turn into months. Peggy is just over three months today and she had her second jabs yesterday. It seems that these certainly hurt a bit more than the first time around! During her first jabs at six weeks, I had my aunty here from the UK and this time Hayden was with me. I am so glad to have some company, it is not nice seeing your daughter scream to the rooftops. Red face and tears streaming. What a thing to watch! But she’s a little trooper and had forgotten all about it after a few sips of milk. She’s also now weighing in at 12.8lbs. Piggy Peggy.

The nurse then did my routine smear test. What a morning this was turning into be! I may have just pushed a child out, but your smear tests certainly don’t get any better, I’m sorry to say.

Peggy has now hit a few milestones which has been very exciting to see. You hear from other people what their children have been up to, but no one really tells you what to expect. I’ve been trying to keep track of each time we notice a change and a progression in her behavior and there has certainly been a lot recently.

When Peggy was first born she pretty much just ate, pooed and slept. Moving into the second week, the poo’s came thick and fast! She began to become more awake and it was noticable how much she would focus on things now. She abosolutely loved flashing lights. I great way to keep her occupied for a few minutes! Moving into two months, Peggy could hold her head up, even with the chubbiest cheeks you have ever seen. Her hands become her second most favourite thing after the flashing lights. They are forever in her mouth which although keeps her quiet, creates a lot more washing from all the dribble.

At three months old, she is extremely chatty. Hayden and I find ourselves ooing and ahhing to her constantly. We are becoming quite proficient at baby language! She can’t yet roll over, but we spend most evenings with her on the floor helping her to learn. The most recent addition to her skills list, is grabbing hold of things. Although she just hasn’t quite worked out how to let go yet.

Last week we moved her from the co-sleeper next to our bed, to a cot in her own room. She seems to love it; we are now quite a few days into her sleeping through the night – 10pm through to 8.30am yesterday! How lucky are we?! Although, my boobs don’t quite agree. Every baby is obviously different though, so for those mums out there with babies not sleeping through the night – it will come, promise.

We’ve ended the day with a lovely walk down the beach with the three dogs. Such a great way to end the day with some sea air.
At Peggy’s Pace

02/07/2025

Hayden has told me I’ve come back down to earth. So now I feel like writing about something different, other than feeling like I’m on planet Mars.

I’ve already touched on where the milk comes from but now wanted to talk about how I get that white stuff into Peggy without her spewing it up, after all it is very precious stuff!

When I started pumping and feeding through a bottle, my midwife spoke to me about pace feeding. I had always thought that feeding through a bottle was just a case of in the mouth and tip up, hey presto. And yes, of course they will drink, but most of it will just come straight back up. Peggy has certainly inherited dads fast drinking skills and feeding her like this would just make her chuck it all back up again. This is where the pace feeding comes in.

My midwife told me how to keep the bottle horizontal, so only half of the teat is filled with milk. This way she will have to work a little harder for a drink, rather than it going straight down. I guess this is also trying to mimic feeding from the breast. When she was really young, she would try to drink so fast that we had to slow her down with a mixture of pace feeding with the bottle horizontal and then tipping the bottle back down, so she wasn’t getting any milk at all, give her a break and go again. Now she is older, she doesn’t get in such a panic that we are starving her! And so, the bottle is horizontal in her mouth throughout the feed. With the bottle horizontal, it also means she can easily turn her head away when she has had enough or wants a break.

When the midwife first showed us this pace feeding technique, we questioned how much air she would be taking in from the bottle. Being farmers, I think we’ve got it drilled into us to make sure lambs don’t take in air when bottle feeding… but turns out Peggy is a human, not a lamb and she’s quite happy with a bit of air.

By feeding Peggy through the bottle, she can drink a lot more in a shorter space of time than she could from the boob. So, I generally try and burp her every 50mls or so. She’s a good pooer and burper which also makes life a little easier!

I’ve always found it quite hard to watch other people feed her. Feeding through a bottle gives you the luxury of anyone being able to feed, but exactly like we were at the start, everyone will generally give her the bottle and tip it straight up. She will handle this much better now she is older, but I find myself worrying like hell but trying to look very calm and collected!

Monday was also a big day for Peggy… she had her first night in her own room. She slept as she usually sleeps with a 3am/4am wake up, so I’ll take that as win. She is growing so fast and now at three months, we are already onto another phase of her life. Crazy how time flies when you’re having fun!